swine flu?

Dang, I feel like crap. Yesterday morning I woke up and I could barely swallow. My throat hurt so bad. Now it's pretty much spread everywhere. My throat hurts, my body is weak, and I'm congested. Lame. Is it possible I have this new crazy flu going around? Haha, Actually I think that'd be pretty tight to be the first case here in Utah. I wonder what it's like being in quarantine. It can't be too bad.
As for now I'm in my own little personal quarantine which involves; me, a lot of orange juice, and High School Musical 2 & 3. Haha. Love it.

eventful weekend....

This past wknd has been filled with a little bit of everything. I had graduation early Friday morning... The family all showed up to support and Kristin actually flew out for the weekend. It was so nice having her here. It's crazy how different things are when you have someone you really care about with you to experience it. She came with me to graduation, kicked it with the crew at the house, met the family, came to the battle, and went with me to church. All of these things were made by better simply by her being there. I want her with me for every major event now and all the small ones in between. Man, I didn't want to take her back to the airport. Hopefully she is able to come out here permanently as soon as possible. I already miss her.

The Lord is in the details....

I saw Kristin again last night. I got back from my trip to the bay area and of course wanted to see her as soon as I could. Before I left on the trip I thought it would be good for us to be away from each other so that we could make sure that we are actually interested in each other. I have heard people say that it's good to be away because it helps you sort through your feelings and can help you grow closer. I agree and disagree. I have spent most of my life without Kristin so, can I live without her? Yes. Do I want to? No. No. No.
I can see the hand of the Lord in almost every detail that led Kristin to me. (I say He led her to me because she actually approached me the night we met) And then a week later she approached me again at a dance. I think the Lord realized I was pretty much useless at dating and knew He would need to step in if I was ever going to be with that person He had in mind for me. Haha.
I can't help but smile right now as I think of the timeline of our relationship. In the span of one month we have gone from meeting to me beginning the journey of falling in love with her. And after 2 weeks of dating I can't picture my life without her. The Lord knows what he's doing. And he does things His way. I NEVER NEVER NEVER thought I would follow the "stereotypical" Mormon pattern of meeting someone and being married soon after. All I can say now is that I'm done trying to do things my way. It's time I exercised a little more faith and let the Lord continue to guide my life.
I'm so grateful to know that He takes an active interest in my life and really in each of our lives. Think for a second about times in your life when you know the Lord has guided you and think if we would just leave ourselves open all the time how much more He could do for us. What a humbling and testimony strengthening experience the past few weeks have been.

honeymoon with my brother....

I just finished reading a book titled “Honeymoon with My Brother.” I bought the book because my boss Tom mentioned it in a meeting last week. He described his friend Franz Wisner, the author, as a man who had everything, lost it and set out to travel the world with his brother. I set a goal this year to read 24 books, two books a month. This was number eight. Easily the best book I have read in a long time. I don’t care if you hate reading, you should read it.

Here’s a snippet from the close of the book:
“A friend e-mailed me during our stop in Cambodia. He wanted to know if the country was suitable for children. Absolutely, I responded, feeling it would be beneficial for kids to see their counterparts playing happily in front of one-room tin-roof shacks. They could learn a lot from the poor. So could their parents. I know I have.”

I have read many times about the conditions of poverty in other countries. I have seen the pictures of the starving children. And I have heard the stories of the people who despite facing a life-long uphill struggle smile at the beginning of each day.

This post was originally going to be a bitter diatribe about how unfair life is and how I want to just leave everything behind and travel the world. About how I want to experience the things I have read and seen pictures of.

How selfish.

I was born in a country that allows me many freedoms. Most importantly, the freedom to practice my religion. The Lord has blessed me beyond measure. He has many things in store for me, but at the moment, traveling is not one of them. I will travel someday, I know it. But at this very moment there are things I need to do with my life to be of service here, both in and out of the Church. And there are things I need to do with my life to help prepare me to raise a family.

Raise a family? Me?

I’ll never be ready for that. Ever. But I have put off preparing myself for it long enough.

So, what am I going to do? Great question. I’m still waiting for the Lord to keep open the doors that need to stay open and to close the doors that need to close.

What’s open right now?
*Grad school (at least until I meet with Sister Walton and get her advice)
*SchoolTipline (As long as we can work out the salary I asked for)
*SecurityOne (as long as I can sell in LA)
*Possibly the Chevron project Tom is arranging.
*Kristin (although who knows how long that will last if she keeps reading my candid posts
to this blog)

Doors recently closed?
*Around the world trip involving the selling of all my possessions
*Hannah (A tender mercy of the Lord)
*Dental equipment sales in Ventura

So I have no idea what’s going to happen. The next few weeks will be interesting to say the least. But I’m making sure that I let the Lord take the reins on this one. I will move forward towards the open doors until he shuts them and guides me somewhere else.

coastal drive....

Last week on the job and they have us traveling up to Northern California to get some more letters for the Jerry Hill district and to do some surveying in the Oakland area. Nice. I like Northern California, it's beautiful. But I still think if I had to live anywhere I would still choose Southern CA. Clark and I decided to drive through Santa Barbara on the way up and kick it at the beach for a bit. Good call. I love the beach. Gonna miss that for sure when I take off. Driving up the coast is SO amazing. There are a couple really good viewpoints along the way and the smell of the forest mixed with the ocean is a pretty good combo.
It's definitely a much longer drive than just hopping on the 5, but totally worth it if you have the time. The long drive gave me some time to think about conference and a bunch of other things going on in my life. It was a really good time for some reflection and to think about where I want my life to be heading....

Sabbath sunrise....

The day started pretty early, I got up a little after 5 got ready and headed over to Kristin's. Beautiful even after rolling out of bed we then headed over to Mulholland Drive. There is a little viewpoint park there that overlooks the Hollywood Bowl as well as downtown LA. It was a crystal clear morning and we got there just as the sun was beginning to come over the horizon. It was amazing to sit and look at such a fast paced city from a distance. I'm so used to sitting in traffic with hundreds of other cars and the hustle of the city. It was nice to sit back and see the city in a different light.
We headed back to Glendale after the sunrise so we could make breakfast. Kristin brought a waffle iron and some waffle mix from Williams Sonoma. Yeah, she loves that store. And yes, I know Mom, you love that store as well so you should be happy about that. Haha. I actually noticed a difference in the taste of the waffles as opposed to normal waffle mix. Of course I had to make sure some kind of crazy sugar was involved so I got strawberries, whipped cream and powdered sugar for the waffles!
Conference was amazing. There were times where I sat there and felt like the speaker was sitting with just me, offering me counsel as I move forward in my life. I feel really strongly about provident living and some changes I need to continue making in my spending habits. I was really touched as I was counseled to embrace change. I can get into a comfort zone very quickly and often hesitate to move forward. This needs to change. It's time to embrace that next chapter in life. And with each day that passes I feel like I'm mroe willing to accept the fact that there are things I need to make less of a priority in order to make myself more available to do the things the Lord wants me to do. I really feel touched by the words I heard and the feelings promptings I received personally.
Oh and how crazy is it that President Munday was made an Area Authority. I just found out he will be the Area Authority over the Utah South Area. What an amazing man and how grateful I am for the things he has taught me both on the mission and after the mission.
Kristin and I literally spent from sunrise to well after sunset together. You would think we would have been more than ready to say good bye at the end of the day. I wasn't ready. We didn't really do much besides watch conference, eat some food and talk. Some times we just sat there with our own thoughts. And I loved it. It felt as comfortable as if I was with one of the guys in the crew, but with one exception, I always feel like standing a little taller and being a little better around her. I'm trying as best I can to show her the respect she deserves. I feel grateful that she is somehow able to see past my weaknesses and flaws.
It's funny how we both feel a sort of familiarity with one another. We have been dating now for just over one week but I get the feeling that we have been friends for much longer. How crazy, but really nice.
I'm leaving today for the Bay Area for a work trip. And I'll be gone all week... We both decided it will be good to take things off for a bit to see if we still really want to be around each other or if we feel differently. It will be interesting for sure to see. But I have a feeling I know how this week will go and how I will feel Friday as I drive back here...

Kozy Korner & the Americana....

It had been 2 days since I last saw Kristin. That's too long... Part of me obviously wants to see her as much as I possibly can because I'm leaving back to Utah in a week. Wow... a week? I can't believe I'm already getting ready to finish up out here. The time has disappeared. I have done so much here and maybe that's why the time has gone in a flash.
Kristin got off work around 7 and after that we headed over to Kozy Korner Thai. Kozy Korner is this small Thia restaurant with the nicest lady owner. I'm going to miss this place. I've gotten Thai there more times than I can remember and if you're ever in the Glendale area you better head over to Wilson Street and check this place out.
I also wanted to get a couple pictures down at the Americana. This is one of the most amazing malls I've ever been too and I've loved going down there to watch the water show at night. It's beautiful.
We watched Nick & Norahs Infinite Playlist after that. Eh. We didn't really care for it. Now I wish we had gotten Eagle Eye instead because I still haven't seen that one.
We talked for awhile about all kinds of different things and she mentioned something about how it was too bad we met so late during my time here. I can't help but think it was by design things played out like this. If I had met her at the beginning of my time out here I may not have even shown interest because I wouldn't allow myself to.
I can't stop thinking about the words of my Bishop back in Provo. He called me out in Sacrament meeting a few weeks before I left, saying, that he wanted to see a wedding invitation from me soon... Haha, I laughed. And later that night he told my brother in an interview that for some reason my name came to is head as he was making the announcements and felt prompted to call me out because he felt I was going to meet someone here in California. Well, I say "someone" but I guess I should say he said I was going to meet the person I was going to marry. I doubted. And doubted all through the entire time out here. But I have to admit I am beginning to push the doubt aside.
I could easily say that because I'm going back to Utah that nothing will happen and I will just move on. But I feel complete when I'm around her. It's a different feeling than I have experienced with anyone before. And I like it. A lot. So I'm not going to go back to Provo and just move on. I'm going to take the advice I've given out dozens of times to other people and I'm going to work for it....

a night at the movies....

I took my last class at Millennium tonight, sad. Because it was the end, I just spent most of the time working on different combinations of things with the teacher (who by the way is only 15. although his sister Shorty is 18. So basically I'm about 8 years older than the average teacher age. haha) I was so exhausted after class that I'm pretty sure I fell asleep in the shower for a minute or 2. It's actually pretty nice with all the steam going everywhere.
Kristin came over again tonight and she planned our outing for the evening. We hit up this drive-in theater over in City of Industry. SO sick! I haven't been to one of those in years. I actually think it was in Utah with Val's family. We went and saw Confessions of a Shopaholic. It's a good thing I'm down with most movies. Haha. We picked up some In-n-Out on the way and had ourselves a nice little old school night with burgers at the drive-in. Honestly I had a blast. What a great night.
Well, as much as I am looking forward to going back to Utah to see the fam (a term which is inclusive of the crew and their respective spouses, haha) I'm not looking forward at all to the idea of not being able to see Kristin. I'm starting to get used to this whole hanging out consistently with one girl thing. haha Who knew it could be so fun?